Benjamin

Benjamin is my boy!  He knows how to fart with his armpit and he LOVES video games!  He was also diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety.  We started his school year with him on medication and it seems to be working well.  We don't have some of the talk that we used to hear from him and he's been more level headed.  We met with the principle, teacher, counselor, psychologist, special ed teacher, etc at the beginning of the year to discuss how to go forward in his schooling.  They have put him on a special program, but we aren't sure anything has changed with his school work.  He still brings home the same homework as before.  He has been doing better on some tests and not so good on others.  But I have seen a real change in him.  He started to get really angry when I would get home from work.  Homework was always a nightmare!  I have a feeling he may be hypoglycemic because he gets overly mean and grumpy when he is hungry.  Chris has been giving the kids snacks after school and it's helped.  I also think it's because his medicine wears off right around 6 PM.  Ben has been going to a social worker since December.  He really likes Mark.  Mark will take him to his office to talk about his week and see what's going on with him.  Ben goes to Mark weekly to share what's up.  Mark can see that school is a major stressor.  Mark recommended we get Ben with a PSR worker.  They take him out into the world and help him to be social.  I have noticed this year that Ben will hiss in kid's faces and push people away.  Occasionally he will kick people thinking he is being funny.  Mark talked to him about when to joke and when to be serious.  That there are times in life you have to know when you can joke and when you can't.  Ben has been so much better since he has been able to confide in Mark about things.  It's been very good for him.  We discuss the meltdowns that occur when waiting in line in a public place etc.  Mark finds out what stresses Ben and then he lets us know how to fix it. It has helped me because I have been brought to tears in the past because I just don't know how to deal.  I have had to hold Ben tight and have a talk to him and we have a power struggle.  Since he has been going to Mark we have had less power struggles!  YAY!

Ben has been having a tough time with school.  Kids call him shorty and they tell him he isn't old enough to be in that grade.  He's one of the older kids in his class, but he is tiny.  Our whole family is tiny!   I try and tell him to just laugh it off and act like it doesn't bother him.  I tell him if he shows that he is bothered they will continue to do it.  I let Mark know about this so he could help Ben know how to respond to kids like that.

Ben had a girlfriend last year....her name was Madison.  Such a cute little blonde girl!  When I 1st met her we were on a walk and went by her house.  She came running and said hi to Ben.  And then she said, "You know what Ben?  People say you are a stinker pants, but you know what I tell them?  Who are you to judge?"  I loved her at 1st convo! :)  He invited her to his b-day party and they were buds for a while hanging out a lot.  And then it stopped and I asked him what happened.  He said she broke up with him.  I told him he is too young to be "dating" anyways.  I let him know to just be friends.  He said his heart was broken.  I told him that he has a long life of having girls like him.  

One thing that motivates Ben is video games.  If we need to ground him it's from games and he follows rules VERY well.  He saw a Minecraft game for the Xbox 360 for $20 and he has been BLAZING through his chores to raise money to get the game.  He has a long way to go because we don't pay THAT much for chores.  BUT I like his enthusiasm :).  He has always been really good at saving money.  I have also noticed that when Ben hears the word "help" he is quick to help.  He LOVES to help!

Ben got roller blades this year and he really likes using them.  He told me the other day that he is getting really good at it.  He also likes to go to the dirt ramps to ride bikes with his friend Nate.

Ben has been in scouts for over a year and when he 1st started scouts he was VERY gung ho about it.  He now says he doesn't want to go and I have to tell him he needs to go and I make him.  He usually ends up enjoying it and coming back refreshed and happy.  He told me one week that he gets in trouble a lot.  I told him he needs to listen to his leaders and follow the instructions.  I feel bad because his meds wear off at the time they have scouts.  Makes it hard on him and them.

 I took the kids to a science fair at BSU and it was so fun!  We will for sure go next year.  Ben got to lay on some nails and the book next to him is a book we bought at the school book fair and he LOVES it!  We have done a few of the science projects in it and it makes him so happy.  He likes to take things apart and try and put them back together again.

For Martin Luther King day Ben's class wrote their dreams on the back of their t-shirts and Ben's was to be the principal of his own school.  He was to do a report on a famous black person and I had him do it on Booker T Washington.  Ben said to me, "You had me do him because he started his own school didn't you?"  Yep!  Ben told me that in his school he is going to have a movie theater.  Cool idea.

Ben is very loving to his sister Emmaline.  He always says in his prayers, "Bless that Emmaline will be cute her whole life even if she wears glasses."  haha  very cute.  And when Emma hits him he will say, "That's ok!"  And I tell him, "it's NOT ok!  She needs to learn not to hit."  He tolerates it because he loves her so much.

Ben and Amelia fight a lot and I remind them both that they will be siblings for life and will eventually be friends.  I tell them how much I miss my brothers and sister and all the fighting we did growing up has been forgotten.  We love each other.  When Amelia sings in the car Ben gets really annoyed (I remember my brother getting annoyed with me too...).  Mark let Ben know that maybe we could tell Amelia she could sing for so long and then be quiet for that long.  I let Mark know that Ben reminded us in the car so I told Amelia she could sing to the rest of the song that was on and then the next one she would have to be quiet.  Mark said that was perfect.  And it did help Ben feel like he was heard instead of us favoring Amelia over him etc etc.  I still have hope for these two :).

Ben loves to snuggle and I haven't been able to do it lately.  I get the kids to bed so late and because Chris works nights I have to put each child to bed by myself.  I usually tuck him in and talk for about 5 min and then I give him a hug and a kiss and say goodnight.  He has to have his red lava lamp on and listen to the Delilah show that's on the radio.  He's such a good boy and SO smart!