Tonight when I got home from work I packed sandwiches & apple slices so we could go on a walk we haven't been on since I started working. I miss the walks I take with my kids all the time! :o( We went to this memorial thing they have by the library that has many famous quotes of people that have made an impact on this country & the people in it. Mainly Anne Frank, but so many others. There are waterfalls there & so we sat down & ate our sandwich dinners & then we took our walk. Things were going well and the kids got out of the stroller & roamed pretty free...we were on a major bike trail & Ben kept jumping in front of people on their bikes!!! Of course I was yelling for him to stand by me & he ran like he didn't know what way to go. Then I lose it & yell at the top of my lungs & he finally listens. Ugh I am so tired of yelling at him all the time! He doesn't listen well at this age!! I am going nuts. Well I made him sit back in the stroller after he ran in front of the same bicyclist twice and almost got plowed down. People looked understanding, but I would have felt horrible if something were to happen to him. Amelia wanted to do everything her brother did haha! It was pretty cute...Ben was climbing on rock after rock...or I should say boulder after boulder. Amelia tried to get up too, but I wouldn't let her. I finally held her hand on one concrete beam thing & she liked that. Then we played pooh sticks in the water at a bridge over the river. We saw fly fisherman too. It was a lot of fun & I had a great time with my kids. Chris was working tonight so I knew I would need to get my little kids out of the house & do something we have always loved to do together...go for walks. Well after bathtime Ben wouldn't listen again & I started bawling & he FREAKED out & cried a lot too...it is amazing how the heart strings are so attached to each other with members of the family. Ben hates it when I cry & it makes him so sad...I held him for a while & let him know I love him so much & I hate having to yell & spank all the time & that I didn't like doing that. We try time out too, but he just is defiant. So he was super sweet tonight & told me that he didn't like me crying & I told him I was sorry. I asked if he would listen to me & daddy from now on because it makes us so sad & he shook his head yes. I am not even sure if it will sink in, but maybe? I don't like crying in front of the kids...I cried on Sunday because I just feel like it is so hard to raise these kids! They are amazing don't get me wrong, but Amelia screams all the time (and I am not exaggerating) and Ben talks back & doesn't listen...you ask him to pick up his toys & he says things like, "My hands are full." (Like tonight he had his sunglasses & he held them in both hands...) Or he says, "I am tired..." Or "You help me." I am thinking...It is way to early for excuses like these to start! Ugh! ;o) I had a melt down Sunday, but I am getting a little better. Anyone else have any stories to share & maybe what I can do to get past this stage?
Monday, September 29, 2008
I Cried in Front of My Kids
Tonight when I got home from work I packed sandwiches & apple slices so we could go on a walk we haven't been on since I started working. I miss the walks I take with my kids all the time! :o( We went to this memorial thing they have by the library that has many famous quotes of people that have made an impact on this country & the people in it. Mainly Anne Frank, but so many others. There are waterfalls there & so we sat down & ate our sandwich dinners & then we took our walk. Things were going well and the kids got out of the stroller & roamed pretty free...we were on a major bike trail & Ben kept jumping in front of people on their bikes!!! Of course I was yelling for him to stand by me & he ran like he didn't know what way to go. Then I lose it & yell at the top of my lungs & he finally listens. Ugh I am so tired of yelling at him all the time! He doesn't listen well at this age!! I am going nuts. Well I made him sit back in the stroller after he ran in front of the same bicyclist twice and almost got plowed down. People looked understanding, but I would have felt horrible if something were to happen to him. Amelia wanted to do everything her brother did haha! It was pretty cute...Ben was climbing on rock after rock...or I should say boulder after boulder. Amelia tried to get up too, but I wouldn't let her. I finally held her hand on one concrete beam thing & she liked that. Then we played pooh sticks in the water at a bridge over the river. We saw fly fisherman too. It was a lot of fun & I had a great time with my kids. Chris was working tonight so I knew I would need to get my little kids out of the house & do something we have always loved to do together...go for walks. Well after bathtime Ben wouldn't listen again & I started bawling & he FREAKED out & cried a lot too...it is amazing how the heart strings are so attached to each other with members of the family. Ben hates it when I cry & it makes him so sad...I held him for a while & let him know I love him so much & I hate having to yell & spank all the time & that I didn't like doing that. We try time out too, but he just is defiant. So he was super sweet tonight & told me that he didn't like me crying & I told him I was sorry. I asked if he would listen to me & daddy from now on because it makes us so sad & he shook his head yes. I am not even sure if it will sink in, but maybe? I don't like crying in front of the kids...I cried on Sunday because I just feel like it is so hard to raise these kids! They are amazing don't get me wrong, but Amelia screams all the time (and I am not exaggerating) and Ben talks back & doesn't listen...you ask him to pick up his toys & he says things like, "My hands are full." (Like tonight he had his sunglasses & he held them in both hands...) Or he says, "I am tired..." Or "You help me." I am thinking...It is way to early for excuses like these to start! Ugh! ;o) I had a melt down Sunday, but I am getting a little better. Anyone else have any stories to share & maybe what I can do to get past this stage?
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3 comments:
I wish I could tell you that it is a phase and that they get over it as they get older, but sorry to tell you they still don't listen as they get older...they do however stop screaming less and it's not too ear piercing. So that is something to look forward to!
Oh Birdy . . .
Every kid is so different. I have done my fair share of crying too. Sometimes I will go months where I am just 'tolerating' a particular one because I am so bothered with them. Then, somehow, things will change and it will be a different one that I am just 'tolerating.'
Kids can be so BOTHERSOME sometimes (except when they are sleeping!).
My kids have totally seen me cry. Not always the funnest experiences, but at least they know it's ok to cry. By-the-way...I tagged you on my blog...check it out.
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