What's Up With Me....

I know it has been a long time since I have written. So long that I wonder if anyone ever checks back to see if I have written anything new haha!

Next week is my 90 days at work! I can't believe I have been there that long. I still love the job! Of course I am going to negotiate my wages with my boss when my 90 days occurs LOL ;o) He said we could negotiate so I AM GONNA haha ;o) Wish me luck!
I have many responsibilities in creating the phone books that we put out. I have been given the task of doing all of the church listings (OUR church listings haha). Boise is VERY hard because a lot of the #'s are missing & so I have to do a lot of research. I actually called the facilities management office & the lady in the Eagle, ID office sent me her list of all of the buildings & their #'s that she had down. She was so nice & she really made my day. Well I got my hopes up for the Boise & Meridian/Kuna FM offices to do the same & no go :o(. The Boise office said they didn't have a list like that & so I am back to square one! UGH! Anyway it is fun seeing how a phone book comes together! And don't hate for getting more than one phone book...here are some ideas of how to use those phone books:

1. Put one in each car...you never know when you will be out & about & need a # for a restaurant or whatever.
2. Have your kids sit on one at the dinner table if you don't want to buy a booster seat ;o).
3. Let your kids play with one...it is one they will enjoy tearing up for at least 30 minutes... so hey free time for mom ;o).
4. Winters get cold & if you have a fire place it makes great kindling haha ;o) (Don't tell my boss I said that...of course I don't mean our phone books, but the competitors haha)
5. Again with the fire advice...when you go camping used it to get your fire started ;o).

I have had a lot of people complain they have gotten too many phone books & so I thought of that list haha ;o) Of course I have to wait until my boss is at lunch to share it with anyone ;o). I really LOVE the :o) face haha!

Ok so this is what is really going on with me at this time. I am not sure how to begin LOL! I use this as a journal & so I hope that I don't offend if I may get too graphic. In November 2007 I started my period again (I hadn't had one for 4 years because I got preg with Ben & then breastfed for a year & then when he stopped I got preg with Amelia & then I breastfed for a year & when I stopped I started my period 2 months later...Nov 2007 ) . The next month I had my period about the same time as the November one & I thought, "ok I may be getting on a normal pattern". I have never been regular in my periods. So January comes & no period. February comes & no period. So Chris runs out & gets a pregnancy test & it shows up negative. Then at the end of Feb I started throwing up & I remember how pregnant throw up is different from regular. I think you mom's who have had kids can relate? It's like a foamy...anyways! So I tell a friend at work & she said, "I bet you are pregnant!" So I let her bring in a pregnancy test (LOL cause I am WAY too cheap to get my own). And I took it at work & it was POSITIVE! I was really calm about it even though I knew I hadn't gotten my insurance from work yet & it considers pregnancy pre existing. I finally got on Medicaid by going to the health department & them proving I was pregnant. So we scheduled a doctor appointment & it took 2 or so weeks to get in to see the doctor. Our appointment was last week & we went in on Wednesday the 9th of April. The doctor did ultrasounds & couldn't find much (we could see the start of a baby, but not much). So the doctor said, "Either you aren't that far along or the baby has stopped growing."
So she had me get blood done & so I did. The next day she calls me & says the test showed that I was 5 weeks along. YAY! But she wanted me to go on Friday to give blood again to make sure all was well with the growing. So I went in Friday & gave the blood & I awaited the doctors call. I called the office twice & they assured me she would call. I get in my car after work & my phone rings. My doctor told me that my HCG levels dropped & that meant miscarriage. She talked to me for about 10 minutes & she finally asked me, "Are you going to be ok?" And I broke down & cried. I cried for about 10 minutes & I think the reason why I cried the most was because I told SO MANY PEOPLE! I didn't want to have to face them & tell them that I was going to lose the baby & have them feel sorry for me. I am not much of a hugger & I knew that I would be getting a lot of those. I LOVE hugs from my husband & kids (don't get me wrong)...but when it's people that I am not close with I am not comfortable. So I text a lot of the people I work with & immediately they all text & called right back to say sorry & to let me know they were there for me...and I just felt loved. I even had a good friend call me that has miscarried a couple of times & I talked to her the whole way home. It is amazing how many women have miscarriages! My mom & many of my friends have. So I know I am not alone. Well today I went to the doctor & she told me the options of what I could do if I didn't want to go the natural route to miscarry. She told me all the horror stuff! She said that with D & C it could be possible that they could puncture your uterus & put a hole in it. Also she said with it that they would keep me awake, but drug me & also gave me the option of some drug where I won't remember?? Which is so crazy to me cause I have a bad memory as it is that I would worry I would forget how to do my job or drive even LOL jk ;o). Then she said there was an option of a drug that would speed the process along, but that it can be VERY dramatic. She said all of the people that did that one wished they had done the natural way. So I went for another blood test & the doctor said it would be an hour to find out & be FOR SURE if I would miscarry. So Chris & I went to Olive Garden & ate lunch & talked about going to UT this weekend for my sister's baby shower (I SO WANT TO GO!!!) And we may do it. Then I got back to work & the doctor called me & told me my HCG levels dropped by 1/2, so definate miscarriage. I also told her we talked about it & decided natural was best LOL ;o). Tonight I was sitting on the couch changing my kid's pictures in the frames on our wall & I went to sit back down & started to fold laundry when I felt a little gush in my pants (I know graphic, but I want to share in case no one has experienced this & wants to know). Anyway I went to the bathroom & it looked like the mucas plug when you are having your baby. So I think my natural miscarriage is happening tonight!!! I haven't had cramping yet, but I feel a lot of flow down below. So I let the other receptionist at work know that it could be happening tonight & I may not be in tomorrow, but maybe I will. I have no idea what is in store for me in the next 24 hours! I pray that the worst of it is over by Saturday, because I REALLY want to see my sister & be there for her & her baby shower!!! Well I hope I didn't freak any of you out, but I hadn't had an exact account of what a miscarriage entails other than you get cramps & yeah. So far no cramps & it has been an hour since the plug. Well I need to go to bed cause I am sure it will be a rough night! ;o)